The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. — 1 Corinthians 7:3
Today’s Dare
If at all possible, try to initiate sex with your husband or wife today. Do this in a way that honors what your spouse has told you (or implied to you) about what they need from you sexually. Ask God to make this enjoyable for both of you as well as a path to greater intimacy.
Was this a satisfying experience for you? If it didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, what do you think is complicating matters? Have you committed this to prayer? If it was a true blessing for both of you, what can you learn from this for the future?
A man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. — Genesis 2:24
Today’s Dare
Is there a “leaving” issue you haven’t been brave enough to conquer yet? Confess it to your spouse today, and resolve to make it right. The oneness of your marriage is dependent upon it. Follow this with a commitment to your spouse and to God to make your marriage the top priority over every other human relationship.
Has this been a hard thing for you to deal with? How has it affected your relationship? If the worse offender in this area is your spouse (with your in-laws), how can you lovingly move this toward a better situation?
Father, keep them in Your name, the name which You have given Me, that they may be one even as We are. — John 17:11
Today’s Dare
Isolate one area of division in your marriage, and look on today as a fresh opportunity to pray about it. Ask the Lord to reveal anything in your own heart that is threatening oneness with your spouse. Pray that He would do the same for them. And if appropriate, discuss this matter openly, seeking God for unity.
Did the Lord open your eyes to anything new that might be giving fuel to this point of disagreement? How do you intend to respond? What do you hope to see God do in your spouse as well?
Render service with a good attitude, as to the Lord and not to men. — Ephesians 6:7 (HCSB)
Today’s Dare
Before you see your spouse again today, pray for them by name and for their needs. Whether it comes easy for you or not, say “I love you,” then express love to them in some tangible way. Go to God in prayer again, thanking Him for giving you the privilege of loving this one special person—unconditionally, the way He loves both of you.
How will this change of motivation affect your relationship and reactions? What does this inspire you to do? What does it inspire you to stop doing?
He laid down His life for us. We should also lay down our lives for our brothers. — 1 John 3:16 (HCSB)
Today’s Dare
What is one of the greatest needs in your spouse’s life right now? Is there a need you could lift from their shoulders today by a daring act of sacrifice on your part? Whether the need is big or small, purpose to do what you can to meet the need.
How much of your mate’s stress is caused by your lack of concern or initiative? When you expressed a desire to help, how did they receive it? Are there other needs you could meet?
Guard my soul and deliver me; do not let me be ashamed, for I take refuge in You. — Psalm 25:20
Today’s Dare
Eliminate the poison of unrealistic expectations in your home. Think of one area where your spouse has told you you’re expecting too much, and tell them you’re sorry for being so hard on them about it. Promise them you’ll seek to understand, and assure them of your unconditional love.
When you place high expectations on your spouse that they don’t feel internally motivated to attain, what does that tell you about yourself? What are some ways to deal with these disconnects?
When you judge another, you condemn yourself, since you, the judge, do the same things. — Romans 2:1 (HCSB)
Today’s Dare
Take time to pray through your areas of wrongdoing. Ask for God’s forgiveness, then humble yourself enough to admit them to your spouse. Do it sincerely and truthfully. Ask your spouse for forgiveness as well. No matter how they respond, make sure you cover your responsibility in love. Even if they respond with criticism, accept it by receiving it as counsel.
What does your mate need to see in order to believe that your confession was more than just words?
What I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ, — 2 Corinthians 2:10
Today’s Dare
Whatever you haven’t forgiven in your mate, forgive it today. Let it go. Just as we ask Jesus to “forgive us our debts” each day, we must ask Him to help us “forgive our debtors” each day as well. Unforgiveness has been keeping you and your spouse in prison too long. Say from your heart, “I choose to forgive.”
What did you forgive your spouse for today? How long have you been carrying the weight of it? What are the possibilities now that you’ve released this matter to God?
Uncategorized | huntley February 1, 2010 | 
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